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Friday, October 14, 2016

Review: Wonder Woman Rebirth #1

This issue opens up with Wonder Woman explaining how her story always chances. I'm sure Dc Comics will say it's Dr. Manhattan making all the chances but I know it's really all the different writers who have written her stories over the years. Don't worry Wonder Woman I'm sure Spider-Man knows how you feel I mean hell they turned the love of his life into a cheater because they didn't want him to get old even though... news flash Marvel we all get old there is no dam fountain of youth so for writing such a shitty story I will tell you to shove it back up your ass where it came from. Like I'm guessing one day one of the Spider-Man writers took a shit and saw a script for a new Spider-Man story mixed in with all his shit and he thought to himself well crap just from the looks of it I can't let it pass me by or else the rest of my life will be shitty. Anyways we see Wonder Woman save a chick from a strip club. Note to self avoid strip clubs cause a lot of bad shit happens there and a lot of bad people hang out there. I was gonna say lonely creepy guys like my friend hang out there but then I remembered that they probably just stay and home and watch videos with hot chicks in it. After Wonder Woman saves the chick from the strip club we see her break a helmet. Then use the lasso on herself to try and find out the truth. Just go to Dc Comics headquarters and ask them to quit changing your story. Knowing them they'd tell you to talk to the one guy who harasses women alone. And then they'd keep making changes and after you talked to the guy who harasses women at DC and gets away with it they'd also tell you that anything you say he did to you was a lie and that if you kept it up you'd either be written out of comics or made into his slave. Anyways after she uses her lasso we get... three pages of adds. FUCKING REALLY DC COMICS! THREE FUCKING PAGES OF THAT SHIT! FUCK OFF! After the three adds we se Wonder Woman break her mirror. I'm taking it she's as mad as I am at those adds. Next we see Wonder Woman go to Olympus where she gets attacked. I blame DC Comics for that Wonder Woman. This issue ends with Wonder Woman saying that whoever is changing her story is scared of her. Artwork was pretty good. Story wise pretty good well except for the three pages of adds. I give this issue a 9 out of 10. All I can say Wonder Woman is no Dr. Manhattan is not scared of you and neither is DC Comics since they're the ones who keep changing your story. Plus they probably think the guy who harasses women at DC would be able to take care of you but I doubt it. So I totally think they should be afraid of you. Things I learned from this issue. DC Comics still doesn't know how to take the blame for something they did. They also love people who harass women cause they let them get away with it even though that shouldn't be the way it goes.

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