When someone loves you

When someone loves you they'll treat u right they'll give u everything u want when ur sad and need them they'll drop what there doing and put ur feelings first and be there when ur crying they'll hold u and not let go they'll love u through thick and thin that means even if u make a mistake they won't just up and leave u they'll stay by ur side and love u no matter what they won't ever leave u if u have someone like this then don't drop them or else ur gona lose someone who could be the best person for u and then in the future u might regret it cause clearly if they love u that much that means ur everything to u and that they'd never use u or want to hurt u sure even if they did it wouldn't be on purpose and they'd feel bad and nit do it again so if u ever find someone like this keep them and never let them go no matter what even if they make a mistake or times get tough cause they'll still be there for u in the end

Facts about me

1: I have depression
2: I'm suicidal at this point in time
3: I'm not afraid of the dark
4: I'd rather be short then tall
5: I like to write on this blog
6: my favorite color is blue or black
7: sometimes I wear all black I guess it depends on the mood I'm in
8: I believe in demons and ghost
9: I don't believe in aliens
10: stormy or rainy days are my favorite they tend to make me happy idk why though
11: I like to hang with ppl but never get out of my house
12: I like my hair to be medium length not to short or really long
13: I like to read when I can
14: I listen to music when I write on my blog or edit pictures
15: I've had nightmares for the last few nights and had them every night I got pills to help but last night they didn't cause it wasn't the best day for me
16: I hate being mean to ppl especially to the ones I love
17: I trust myself cause I've had ppl stomp on me when I needed them and trusted them
18: when I'm not ok and someone says are u fine and I say yes don't keep asking or ull piss me off
19: I have breathing problems
20: when I was younger I had seguriz however the heck u spell it I guess I got lucky to live even though right now I doubt I should have lived
21: when I'm lonely like I am now I go deep in my mind and won't come out for anyone unless I feel they won't hurt me
22: I will keep my feelings to myself cause why tell anyone if they won't help
23: I still love my ex even though she dumped me and it's causing me pain and I feel like I'm just done and don't want to fight anymore so I won't accept any help cause I'm stubborn
24: I'd rather have someone to trust and talk to so I don't feel lonely when I do and ppl to help but I guess I'll stick with myself at this point

Giving up

I wanted to write this cause this might be the last time I write in here things have happened that have just finish me I have no hope I feel alone and like I can't fight to live anymore I saw the doctors last night cause I'm thinking of just ending it it'd be better off for me is what I think so I have to stay home fir 3 days but I'd rather not be here I'd rather be at the hospital cause I don't trust anyone her I'm not gona eat and I probley won't get any sleep cause right now I'm out of it but oh well it's the hand I get dealt and for what I didn't mean to do what I did but oh well I guess I deserve it I just won't trust no one anymore cause I give up

My perfect day

If I had 24 hours to do whatever I wanted I'd spend the day with my girl I'd do whatever she wanted I would buy her stuff I'd relax with her and let her know how much I care for her and love her I'd let her know everything would be ok that I'd still be with her watching over her even through death

I hate players

So I just watched a video on YouTube where they were talking about players giving them advice all I have to say is being a player is wrong u shouldn't be 1 cause if a girl is already emontionly damaged then ur making things worse and ruining her perspective on guys to where she thinks there all bad and has a hard time trusting a guy which is fucked up cause maybe if alot of guys or all guys weren't players and didn't break girls hearts then things wouldn't be so messed up cause in a relation ship u should be onest and trust the other person so my advice don't be a player be a gentalman and I'm not a player I belive in not cheating or hurting a girl so I'm trying my best to be the nicest and best guy to my girl cause I care about her and love her alot I'd do anything she asked me to do cause that's how much I respect her and love her

She gives me reason to live

This is for my girl the title is so true she has given me reason to live ever since she steped into my life I haven't given up ya I'll hit a few bumbs and be down for a few days or weeks but she's always there to pick me back up and make me happy she loves me I can see it in her and I love her for her being her cause she's always here for me without her I wouldn't be here she's my reason I'm still here is so I stay to keep her happy I love seeing her smile it always brightens my day she has such a beautiful smile shes beautiful always I will always love her no matter what cause just her being mine makes me happy she don't need to buy me nothing cause she's all I want all I need I'm so glad she's mine she's my everything my only love so babe thank u for always being here for me and I love u so much I don't know what I'd do without u I will always love u <3

Bullshit blog update #32

It's been a long time since I have done 1 of these probley cause I can't find nothing to write about in this but I've been watching the scream movies I'm on scream 3 right now I can't wait to start the 4th so I'll probley do that over spring break and make a new YouTube video if I can think of anything if u have ideas let me know