Review: All-new Wolverine #10

This issue opens up with Ulysses having a vision about Laura, Old Man Logan and lots of blood. Hey from the little bit I saw he might be sacrificing alot of animals for something. Also great Captain Fuck Face is in this issue and so is the racist guy who see ls the future. Next we see Old Man Logan wake up to whale sounds. For a minute there I thought my friends ex girlfriend would be in this issue. Yes she is a whale. Anyways later on some robbers break into Lauras apartment which causes all three of our Hero's to laugh. Man those guys are brave. Heck if I was them I would have backed out slowly once they started laughing. You jerks why'd you have to shoot Jonathan? Dam Gabby is badass. Note to self don't shoot Gabby's pet. Well those guys will probably feel stupid once they wake up. Also note to self don't try to rob Laura unless you want your ass handed to you. I'm Old Man Logan she's not from your future which means she won't do what your Gabby did in the future you came from. This issue ends with Captain Hydra and his men swarming Laura's apartment. Artwork was weird. The story was a psa for people thinking about robbing Laura's apartment. So I give this issue a 6 out of 10. I really hate Captain Hydra.

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Review: Scooby Apocalypse #2

This issue opens up with our main characters getting out of the safe zone. Later on we see Doctor Dinkley get attacked by one of her coworkers who is now a giant monster. Note to self don't work for top secret governments or scientist unless you want to turned into a giant monster that eats people then go ahead. Wait why are they all in a monitor room and not the fuck out of that shit hole? I think I've lost brain cells just by them being idiots and not getting the hell out of there. Finally they got some weapons and are moving. Wait if Daphnes family is so rich from bubble bath products then why doesn't she just stay in the family business instead of trying to make a TV show. Like hell if I invented stuff that people can use to have a bubble bath then you bet your but I'd stay in that business. Next we almost see Shaggy have a pda moment with his work crush who is also a monster. Um Daphne you just killed a human. I mean sure she looked like a monster and wanted to eat Shaggy but she was still a human. Oh great Daphne now her kids don't have a mom anymore. Does that make you happy? If so you are a sick sick woman. Anyways next we see them all crawling around in the vents trying to get to the garage. I'm surprised none of them feel like a tv dinner while crawling around in the vents. Finally they get to the garage and find a vehicle that some scientist was making that he calls his mystery machine. I'm guessing at some point there will be a dead flower along with a skull on both sides to fit the universe they're in. To see what happens next go buy and read this issue. Artwork was great. As for the story it was slow and made me lose a few brain cells so I give this issue a 7 out of 10. Things I learned from this issue. You could make a drinking game out of all the times that Norville tells someone to call him Shaggy. Shit gotta get some acohal and take a shot.

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Review: Uncanny X-Men #4

This issue opens up with Mystique dancing with the same dude at the end of the last issue. I was gonna type what the hell is his name but I just remembered it's Fantomex. Anyway there scene almost put me to sleep so I'm glad it was short. The whole scene with Magneto and Triage alone on Genosha gives you the feeling that shits gonna hit the fan there. Next we see some of The Dark Riders go head to head with Shen Xorn who beats them. Dam he is badass but so is his face or mask. I think if I ever start up cosplay that he'd be the first person I'd cosplay as. By the way have him and Iron Fist ever went head to head? If not I wonder who would win. Also if they'd all attacked him at the same time I'm sure they would have won but hey bad guys never think that shit through. Later on we see the rest of the Uncanny X-Men go to Egypt where they fight The Dark Riders. Um why is that dude orgasming by just seeing Archangel outside. My guess is that Apocalypse is inside him or something. Also dude chill out I'm pretty sure he wouldn't want you to bust a nut over him. Well that fight didn't go as planned. That last panel is just awesome. To see what I mean you should definitely go buy this issue or even the volume and read it for yourself so you can see what I'm talking about. Artwork was awesome. The story was great to I give this issue a 10 out of 10. Things I learned from this issue. If you jump out of a jet or airplane without a parachute while attacking your enemies it shows them how buck wild you are. Note to self do that shit so people will know how buck wild I am.

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